bye bye 2009. hello 2010.

Last year (i cannot imagine i am already terming 2009 as last year!!) has just passed and i told myself to do some reflections on God's blessings on me throughout the 365 days.

1. Coping with William's absence and staying strong (My biggest blow n biggest blessing of my life)

With his absence, i learnt to be independant(making decisions, changing light bulbs, washing aircon filters, taking public transport home), patient (towards his parents and other people when they are talking), less hot tempered (anyway no one to vent my anger except God already so i must tame my temper =p)and most importantly, less prideful!!

All along, i didn't know i am a prideful person. Until God speaks to me thru a sister today. I kept thinking i am just stubborn only. i cannot stand it when somebody says negative stuff about me or criticise me, even it's meant for good. it just feels pricky and I'm a all defensive person. I never realise until Liam is gone. All these while, God has been speaking thru liam about my pridefulness and I didn't know. But deep in my heart, I know i need to change, and accept that i need to mould my character, to be wholesome in Christ.

2. Coping with stress and expectations/demands/requests.

I am an easily stress up person. When someone ask me things or family members demand me to do something, i will get really annoyed and pissed. But i realise, no matter how pissed i am, i still need to get it done. so i tell myself, what for making myself feel so terrible n bad mood? y not take one step at a time, i will complete the task with God's strength n in God's time. Now, my only lifeline is gone,

3. Learning or facing hate most difficult task - financial control

My only ATM lifeline (Liam) is gone. I am faced with his dad's debt, helping to study n understand the bills with Yaoliang Huisin n many other people's help. i am still learning to discipline myself. so many finances at ahnd. Liam's dad, our wedding fund, my savings for wedding and liam's savings. Head really big sia.

4. To learn to bring my thoughs (negative and positive) to Christ. Not affecting myself negatively or putting myself down.

I know how it feels to suffer minor depression. and how hard to get out of it, with my own strength. it is impossible.


And in this new year, like i stated in my resolution, I must learn to be less prideful. ANd i know when i pray for it, Lord will give me plenty of opportunities to mould my character to become more like Him. and challenges to overcome my pridefulness.

VCSPP - Victorious Christ Like Servant with passion and PURPOSE. What are you living for? What would Jesus do if He were u?